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The Moon Is In Fact Cheese

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Zack Bernius

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The Moon Is In Fact Cheese

People for a long time now have believed that the moon is just a piece of rock orbiting our planet, and that it controls the tides. However I have an alternative truth. The truth being…

the moon…

is in fact…

cheese.

I have a plethora of undeniable evidence as to why I am correct and everyone else is not.

 

1. The color of the mold is grey because the cheese has been slowly molded and because of the amount of rocks it absorbs everyday. Also its hard because certain spots the meteorites weren’t fully absorbed.

 

2. The moon is cheese because think about this: every time the moon is supposedly hit by a meteorite shouldn’t it get closer? That would happen if it was in fact cheese. Cheese would absorb the meteor making it so it stays in the same place

 

My research team and I asked a student who asked to remain unnamed their opinion. And I quote: “THE MOON LANDING WAS FAKED! THERE’S NO WAY A BALL OF CHEESE COULD SUPPORT A SPACESHIP!”

 

This is also why the moon landings were fake because the surface of the moon wouldn’t be able to hold up a lunar lander. Like kelsey said who would ruin good cheese. We can also identify what type of cheese the moon is and its age.

 

       Anonymous said, “it has holes, so it has to be swiss.”

    3. But it has to be Tyrolen cheese since it slowly goes grey over time. This cheese was discovered over 5,000 years ago, but that’s only when we discovered it. So if when the earth was hit by the meteor that killed the dinosaurs. Would enough Tyrolean cheese been launched into the atmosphere to form the “Moon”.

 

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